My Goodbye

Subject: My Goodbye Fri Dec 21, 2012 2:15 am

Now that I know nearly everyone I use to share my best days with are all gone, I think it’s best to leave this final goodbye to be read by no one (or maybe a few depending on a few looky-loos who still checks this site). This was not how I wanted to go out and certainly not be left without a message; it wouldn’t be me. You all already knew about what happened to me in January and to tell you the truth, deep down I’ll never forget, but I’m finally healthy enough to move on (several months later). Obviously I wasn’t well after I came back from my first absents and instead of trying to work it out on the side, I brought it to TD only to make it worse. Couple that up with several members moving on, and that was all it took for me to shut down.

It’s sad to think that I have lived such a short life and I’m filled with so many regrets because I either made broken promises or I never took a chance on things. The biggest regret will always be never materializing the vision of TD and all the other things I said I would do for this guild. As much as everyone liked to dispute, I was never meant to be the main guy --- I’m not built like that and it doesn’t and will not ever suit me. I have always been the guy in the shadows, helping along the main person and it does not bother me one bit if they get the credit because at the end of the day, I know I did my job and that’s enough for me.

So, now that I have stated my piece, I wish to address the people I cared deeply for starting with Ariana.

@Ari: Just so you know, the reason I joined Team Dramander was in the wishful thinking that you would join as well. If it wasn’t obvious to you, I liked you a lot (like a crush). I think everyone in the guild knew that but I never told you that because as you know, I’m not straight-forward. Anyways, you were one of the closest of my friends here. You saw how I took you leaving to that other guild personal because that was how close I valued your friendship that I would fight to make sure you stayed. I told you nearly everything about me and my life outside TD and I heard yours and in a way you helped make my days better. I’m not sure if you care anymore for my words, but I wish you well with your future. I hope you one day do make music and make it big and that you found the one in James and that you find happiness and peace in your life. You’ve been a great friend to me, sorry it ended like this.

@Felipe: I will always remember the first time we met. Opposite personalities, yet we became friends didn’t we? Now, I don’t blame you if you don’t feel that way anymore because we’ve become almost like strangers but still – from one stranger to the other – I wish you the best in your future. Just so you know, I admired your intelligence and your steadfast opinions. It may have conflicted with mine many times, but if I learned anything from you, it was to be more straight-forward. You summed it up perfectly to me – I just can’t face rejection – coming from the life I have, the word rejection is so... foreign. Thank you for putting up with me and all my mind-less chatter and thanks for the advice I sought from you when I needed it. I have coined Peaches as my nickname and will carry it with me for the rest of my life - thanks for that. I may not have been a close friend of yours, but you were one my closest. (Just in case you’re wondering, I registered as an Independent – you can guess who I voted for. I miss talking about politics.)

@Memi: Let me start off by saying that although we had many rough moments, I still thought of you as one of my closest friends. Out of everyone, you probably knew the most about my life and problems, and my hopes and dreams and everything seemed to spill out when I chatted with you. Sorry that it wasn’t a two-way street and you didn’t deserve to put up with some of the things I did and as a result, I lost a great friend. I try to think that I’ll get another chance to repair our friendship but if that never happens, thanks for the memories on TD. Thanks for your enthusiasm for the guild and trying to unite everyone – you were the spirit that embodied what TD was all about. Good luck in life and with your future and ambitions.

@Euph: David, I think you became my closest friend in the end when everyone started to drift off. It’s sad that I didn’t take the opportunity to continue to build on that and let it go when I left for the second time on TD. If anything, I think you were the one I could just have a good ‘bro talk and I’ll always remember you as the lasagna eating, zombie watching, and orange aficionado who believed he had nine tails and was euphoric all the time. Truth be told, you were a great friend to me. Thanks, and good luck with your future and ambitions.

@ BigMac: You always had my respect because of the way you were enthusiastic about TD and always willing to help out the guild. I’m sorry that I didn’t do my part to move it along. To me, I liked your confidence because really, I have a hard time managing my one personality and you can juggle nine or ten... kidding aside, thanks for helping me out when I needed it back in January and if we see each other on writing.com again, I’ll be happy to maybe collaborate a fiction piece with you. Good luck with you and your future.

There you have it. You guys were the people I cared and still care for the most. I wish you all well and as for me, I’ll move on to where I’m supposed to go. Judging from the last visit list, I’m sure a few of you will still stick around this dying forum as will I.

I have it in my head that maybe I could still make use of this site somehow, but judging that I didn’t even finish the second Pokemon Black/White, I doubt I’ll be returning to PWO. I just felt there was too much corruption from the top to make it enjoyable for the members down below. Anyways thanks everyone. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Sun Dec 23, 2012 1:20 am

Micahel, I never felt like our friendship was broken. I always kept coming back to the forums just to see if you were still active or would come back to see us. I refuse to say goodbye. I am mostly on Skype and Steam, or even facebook. Just reply and I'll know you still want to chat like old times. I'm so glad you're feeling better and glad you made a post. Thank you Micahel..

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Sun Dec 23, 2012 11:23 pm

Throughout our time together, there's a good chance I prodded you the wrong way as I tend to do with just about everyone and for that I apologize, but it made me happy to read your opinion of me. Like Memi said in the status box, I hope you'll get Skype and stay in touch with us. Username is RedHerring1290 (what else would it be?).

That goes for you too, Memi, if you're willing to deal with me.

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Mon Dec 24, 2012 11:07 am

MicahelN wrote:: @Euph: David, I think you became my closest friend in the end when everyone started to drift off. It’s sad that I didn’t take the opportunity to continue to build on that and let it go when I left for the second time on TD. If anything, I think you were the one I could just have a good ‘bro talk and I’ll always remember you as the lasagna eating, zombie watching, and orange aficionado who believed he had nine tails and was euphoric all the time. Truth be told, you were a great friend to me. Thanks, and good luck with your future and ambitions.

So the prophecy was true, the great leader has returned!

Thanks for the kind words, Mike. It's always good to know you're appreciated.

I'd have written my own my own goodbye if I wasn't checking the forums every now and then (Without logging in)
Anyways, add me on Skype: AFK-Eupharia (If you're wondering what the AFK part is about, ask Fish.)

That goes for anyone else who wants to catch up as I'm never on MSN anymore.

As for the idea about a conference call on Skype with all the TDG members, (That may have been discussed in the chat) I think that's a mighty fine idea.

Happy Holidays n' stuff.

EDIT: So I herd you liek Black/White 2? T'is the first pokemon game I've bought in years and Fish has it also so I reckon you should start training for a TDG tournament (My 'mons are currently around lvl 70).

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Tue Dec 25, 2012 5:01 am

Euphy, I added you *cough*

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Wed Dec 26, 2012 12:36 am

I would tell you to "add me here" "have my username for ____" "email me" I'd tell you any of those cause I would love to still talk with you time to time, but to be honest, I really am no good on the internet. As flipped as you might feel, I am and always will be superstitious of giving anyone my fb, like anyone.. I've kept it so clean filled with all my real life friends, the ones i talk to. I'm not one of those people who just adds every face they've ever seen. Like I have less than 65 friends. Besides Facebook I dont really use my email too much. I have a gmail that I use mostly for school stuff and my msn is like for outside of school stuff. I haven't been on msn too much cause I usually go on there expecting things like job emails, or some bills but other than that nothing. I'd tell you to come back with PWO and play here and there like me, but the reality is like a lot of us we get bored of things on that MMO too quickly. The only thing that keeps me coming back around to it is whenever a new quest is made, like right now their xmas quest, trying to catch the HR Froslass haha. As for anything else I do online, Minecraft...yup thats about it, my interlife isn't as big as it used to be. It disturbs me in a way that I've eliminated a lot of my time away from it, but at the same time I suppose its been doing me some good letting me be more social outside my own bedroom.

I'm glad you value me that close a friend, Of course you know me.. my usual oblivious would have never assumed you liked me that much as a friend but isnt life full of surprises around the holidays? Yea I'm sorry that this year has been so full of disappointment for this guild, I kinda feel like its my fault.. Ever since I let down my hopes of making PWO staff Ive come to realize that my time on PWO isnt the same time I used to put in for enjoyment/productivity and trying to semi moderate chats. It was all a waste. Im not gonna make it there, ever. I look back and say to myself that I wish I wasn't such a try hard. Irl its ironic b/c I give all my efforts to work, caring for pple, school and etc and I suppose its better Im like that irl rather than over a screen, no? But yea, come every new quest, don't hesitate to think I wont be around. If theres something to do, im reachin out to try the new things. I feel like all this had a great factor for myself and maybe others coming on at their old regular routines. I fet like without you at times it was me trying to keep everything still going until I just lost all confidence and dropped the guild tag. I'm sorry if I wasn't myself and try to bring back everything again like I've done so before, I think its time we just all not worry about PWO as a whole and still meetup here on this forum. Bringing back our activity here would be nice for a change Happy

I think i've babbled enough. I tend to get off topic too much or really babble about uesless stuff beyond my control, just by nature. I hope your holidays are going well (this goes for everyone!) and yea I'll still be around on this site if you ever wanna message me. I'm more likely to check my messages here than on msn. Yea, thats about it, happy holidays, god bless :<3:

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Sun Dec 30, 2012 1:37 pm

Wow you are back Shocked

Thanks for the message. But who was I kidding. Maybe I truly believed it at the time, but it was this place that taught me I'm unwilling to go outside my comfort zone to help. I never did recruit anybody because I'm bad with strangers (or any people). I'm actually surprised I even found the commitment to make the [rather bad] guild videos. I seem like I'm willing to say "I'll help" to convey a good impression, but with no intention to deliver, at least in a timely manner. As for writing.com, I'll be surprised if I get that stuff started before I go to college.

Edit: Crabpy gets filtered out. Ok Suspect

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Fri Jan 04, 2013 5:04 pm

Keep in touch..... I feel shaky.... am I going to drop outta the sky now? hope not... I don't see a pokecenter anywhere.

Maj Skype is BlackHawk1299 if us wanna addz me

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Fri Jan 04, 2013 5:25 pm

Did I scare you away again with my negativeness and lack of self-confidesteem, Peaches? We need to set a date for that conference call...

(The hybrid word "confidesteem" is (C) 2013 by Macaroni Productions under all rights reserved)

And I've added Hawk you

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Sat Jan 05, 2013 1:06 am

Omygawd It's hawk! Now all we need is Ray, Lewa, and Pyro

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Sun Jan 06, 2013 7:36 am

I see me mentioned. Decided to stalk the place a bit...

As good a place as any to do what I was planning. IF there's any chance of anyone wanting to add/talk to me on Skype or something, would be fun to catch up again.

Got the choice of Skype (ATyphlosion), the almost going to be shut down kinda thing MSN (RandomRayquaza@gmail.com) or the highly doubtful use of Facebook (Clickable spot)

Subject: Re: My Goodbye Mon Jan 28, 2013 12:53 pm

No idea what this is all about but I see people posting their Skype username so I guess I'll do the same. My Skype name is toa_lesovikk, though I'm more active on Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/Lewa-Lee .

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